I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
My one night stand asked me out to dinner. When he came to pick me up I got in the back seat. I thought he sent an uber. Awkward.
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
I’m at the Eye doc, sitting in the waiting room. The woman next to me is highlighting passages in her bible. I’m watching pornhub on mute. I clearly need some penis, or Jesus.
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