i woke up with toilet paper straight tucked up in my underwear wearing a pizza sauce mustach. I dont think i got laid last night.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
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