I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
Randomize
