It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
Someone broke into my car and stole it then left me $300 to pay for the damages with a lovely note that said "we just couldn't pass up the boxed wine... Sorry about the window."
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
Randomize