what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
Randomize
