I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
Whatcha textin bout Willis?
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
This toilet bowl is my home.
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