Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
Randomize
