I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
I was about to send you a concerned-for-your-safety text b/c it took you more than ten seconds to respond to a text that mentioned both the bar and lesbians
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
Randomize
