he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
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Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
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It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
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