im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
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