I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
I forgot how hot balto sounded
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
I just threw up in the bathroom next to the zebra exhibit. The kids don't know I skipped a beat. Best nanny, ever.
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
Randomize
