So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Randomize