if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
my phone is just a graveyard for last nights mistakes. at least it's giving me hints as to where i was though, i'm like carmen sandiego
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
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