Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
areolas are like halos for boobs.
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
Randomize
