Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize