I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize
