Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
