he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
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