people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
Help me help you realize you are a moron
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