I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
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