when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
You fell asleep mid BJ last night. I put your pants back on you. My ego is pretty bruised this morning.
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
Randomize
