If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
Randomize
