he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
God that barista is texting me bout his life like i care i mean dude just hook me up with free coffee thats why i gave you my number
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
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