Wearing these hooker shoes was a mistake
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
i will replace your cream cheese. there's enough for breakfast. you are my friend. i had guests we wanted bagels so bad im sorry. i left you notes. i love you. you have enough for a bagel or two and i will get you more. you are so pretty.
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
Randomize
