Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
I was going through my mom's stuff to find her xanax, and I found her vibrators instead. Plural. That is like the opposite of what I wanted.
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
Randomize
