Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
Randomize
