our cab driver is having phone sex.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
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