Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
Randomize
