I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
Randomize
