I went to the gynecologist and they said, "you're the most fun person we've ever had," and i thought, "that's exactly why i'm here!"
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
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