just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize
