Kirsten Dunst is sitting next to me in a bar in NYC
Tell her I want my money back for Elizabethtown.
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
So the girl I hooked up with last night pretended to be from Comcast when my girlfriend stopped by this morning. She even made a fake appointment to check her internet. Best hookup ever.
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
Randomize
