Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
The dog destroyed my vibrator and swallowed several pieces. Vet gave us a laxative so now I’m checking lots of dog shit and having no orgasms. Plus the cute vet knows I don’t get enough dick, so that’s just great
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