honey bunches of taint.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
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