When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
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