i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
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