is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
I woke up on the side of the highway to the ppl in orange jumpsuits cleaning to comunity service. Not sure which freaked them out more... Finding a dead b ody or me not being dead
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
He literally asked permission to hit on me
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