I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
Just chased the kids into the backyard with kitchen knives. Best. Babysitters. Ever.
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
Wedding update: no alcohol, 75% of people have left, no one is dancing, no single groomsmen, and it's 5:30. I'm going the fuck home to drink by myself.
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
Randomize
