why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
Randomize
