I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
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