And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend?
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
Randomize
