all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
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