I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
Randomize
