Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
Randomize
