they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
Randomize