if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
so I definitely just chased tequila shots with a biscuit covered in sausage gravy
Thats fucking manlier than riding a bear into battle
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
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