You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
We have so much sex to catch up on
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
We're hate flirting, damnit.
Randomize
