I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
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