im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come share oat with me in your robe
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
Staff meetings will be awkward since my boss and I both did the new intern
Maybe she doesn’t know you did him
Oh she definitely knows - it was a threesome
Please tell me you’re not taking life advice from porn scripts again
Randomize