Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
you're like the Neil Armstrong of terrible hookups, you are a pioneer
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
Today is definitely a "stand over the toilet and pee through the opening at the bottom of my boxers" kind of day.
I guess the silver lining is that having a big dick really comes in handy when you're hungover.
It's a mixed blessing.
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
Can you come pick me up and take me to breakfast then the police station?
Where's your car?
The girl I brought home apparently stole it
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
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