I discovered last night there is no graceful way to remove your face from your gf's crotch when your parents walk in the room
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
Randomize